Oh my goodness.
So I didn't work out Christmas Eve...or Christmas Day...in fact I "took this week off" as in I decided not to weigh myself since it's the holiday and all. Plus I have Christmas Eve traditions I just can't ignore...see Nana's cut out cookies, gumbo, and Meet Me in St. Louis. But I learned something in this mini break.
I hate working out.
BUT!
I totally love it.
I'm for serious. Hello contradiction!
Today was a cardio heavy workout and for some reason, I've kind of skipped them this month....cause I sort of prefer pounding away on the elliptical. I don't know why...I feel more accomplished for some reason. Maybe it's because I can see the super high estimated calories I burn on the screen or something. But I did almost all of it tonight (hello, I'm still way out of a shape I've never been in!). But then Ke$ha and Pitbull's new song came on..."Timber"...and I'm all like it's on!
Shit is totally happening this time! I can feel it!
I will make people jealous of me. Oh you better believe it.
Gosh! I feel so good after a workout!
Thursday, December 26, 2013
Friday, December 20, 2013
When Life Hands You Lemons, Make A Baby!
So this happened:
Yep. I'm serious.
I went back and looked and my last post was February 5th. Almost exactly 8 months later, this little button arrived. Her name is Rinoa and she's pretty much the most awesome thing ever. And looking back at the totally emoness of that post...my mood totally makes sense to me now!
I had thought about posting some in the midst of pregnancy, but it obviously never happened. And that's ok. Because really I think it would have messed with my head some. And pregnancy messed with my whole get fit mentality enough...I didn't need any extra help.
My pregnancy itself was pretty easy, I guess. But the first trimester totally killed me. All I did was sleep and think. For the first month I got super depressed. I had these grand fitness plans that were deliciously outlined in my very first post. And then I got pregnant and I couldn't push myself anymore. I got terrified of everything. And then my morning sickness, while it wasn't bad, I had zero appetite up until halfway through my second trimester.
But this pregnancy taught me a lot about my body. My body is seriously capable of being fit. I'm not sure what the final total was...I haven't weighed myself yet...but I'm pretty sure I never went over the 30 lb mark of preggo weight gain. I didn't blow up like I was always afraid I would.
I'm still debating on whether or not I'm going to weigh myself. I may just do this all based off inches and appearance. But then I need to figure out a new reward system...which for some reason seems daunting. And while I might not have this all completely gone
3 weeks later, I changed my mind! I am weighing myself...While inches are nice to go by, I couldn't figure out how many inches to lose...so I stuck with weight. Cause I know how much I need to lose and it's just waaaaay simpler.
I'm rushing right back into losing 50 pounds by Phoenix Comicon again. And I know I can totally do it.
Luckily I was able to get in with the #fullbodymakeover over at blogilates.I'm following her workout calander to the best of my ability and I'm following her 12 week meal plan, which is daunting, but is forcing me to try new things. I've already made homemade banana pancakes, crepes, and tortillas!
I'm feeling fancy up in here.
I'm 3 weeks in right now with 2 weeks on the meal plan. I have already lost a few pounds and inches and I'm getting way stronger a lot faster than I thought I would, which is so awesome. I psyche myself out a lot, thinking that the end is so far away and I'll never see progress. But I'm sure I'll start seeing it soon! It takes 4 weeks for me to notice, right? And my stretch marks are already looking more pink that red/purple!
My first hurdle is 10 pounds...I always seem to lose steam super fast after 10 pounds...that hurdle is fast approaching.
I promise to update this way more often!
Yep. I'm serious.
I went back and looked and my last post was February 5th. Almost exactly 8 months later, this little button arrived. Her name is Rinoa and she's pretty much the most awesome thing ever. And looking back at the totally emoness of that post...my mood totally makes sense to me now!
I had thought about posting some in the midst of pregnancy, but it obviously never happened. And that's ok. Because really I think it would have messed with my head some. And pregnancy messed with my whole get fit mentality enough...I didn't need any extra help.
My pregnancy itself was pretty easy, I guess. But the first trimester totally killed me. All I did was sleep and think. For the first month I got super depressed. I had these grand fitness plans that were deliciously outlined in my very first post. And then I got pregnant and I couldn't push myself anymore. I got terrified of everything. And then my morning sickness, while it wasn't bad, I had zero appetite up until halfway through my second trimester.
But this pregnancy taught me a lot about my body. My body is seriously capable of being fit. I'm not sure what the final total was...I haven't weighed myself yet...but I'm pretty sure I never went over the 30 lb mark of preggo weight gain. I didn't blow up like I was always afraid I would.
Above was probably about 10 weeks
This was 37 weeks
This was about 4 weeks Post Partum
At 8 weeks, I still have some of the original baby bloat. My appetite was still on par with my pregnancy metabolism, and since things have slowed down, my body hasn't finished adjusting yet. And I'm ok with that as long as I finish adjusting here soon.
3 weeks later, I changed my mind! I am weighing myself...While inches are nice to go by, I couldn't figure out how many inches to lose...so I stuck with weight. Cause I know how much I need to lose and it's just waaaaay simpler.
I'm rushing right back into losing 50 pounds by Phoenix Comicon again. And I know I can totally do it.
Luckily I was able to get in with the #fullbodymakeover over at blogilates.I'm following her workout calander to the best of my ability and I'm following her 12 week meal plan, which is daunting, but is forcing me to try new things. I've already made homemade banana pancakes, crepes, and tortillas!
I'm feeling fancy up in here.
I'm 3 weeks in right now with 2 weeks on the meal plan. I have already lost a few pounds and inches and I'm getting way stronger a lot faster than I thought I would, which is so awesome. I psyche myself out a lot, thinking that the end is so far away and I'll never see progress. But I'm sure I'll start seeing it soon! It takes 4 weeks for me to notice, right? And my stretch marks are already looking more pink that red/purple!
My first hurdle is 10 pounds...I always seem to lose steam super fast after 10 pounds...that hurdle is fast approaching.
I promise to update this way more often!
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
The Days They Blend Together
Depression, when based on poor self esteem and poor body image, is a severely terrible vicious cycle.
I feel bad about myself
Nom nom on the cookies
Now I'm totally looking fat and old
Nom nom on the burger and fries
I shouldn't be eating this
Frown, cry, and nom nom on something bad some more.
Rinse and Repeat.
I feel like crap...and depressed...and then I eat...and feel like crap because of what I'm doing. And you'd think the obvious solution would be to only feed my emotions with healthy foods, but my brain takes on a life of it's own. It's like invasion of the body snatchers and before I know it, half a container of those delicious sugar cookies with the heaping mound of frosting is already gone.
And to top it all off, I wore the least flattering, slinky, clingy top I probably own to work today. I look like crap. I'm hanging out all over the place and you can see the jiggle when I walk. This will get washed and then promptly thrown into the closet of "clothes I'll fit into because I did when I met my husband". In there would be my goal size 10 skinny jeans from Old Navy that I haven't worn in a really really long time.
The Super Bowl was this weekend and we had friends in town. I might as well have been turned into an actual pig with what I put into my mouth. It was outrageous. But I didn't stop it. I thought about it a few times...unfortunately, however, that thing about it being the thought that counts, doesn't work when you stuff your face with mini corndogs and beer and super bowl party munchies for an entire weekend.
I haven't weighed myself and I'm debating on whether or not to put it off for another week.
I feel like such a failure. I always get to the 10 lb loss mark and something in me just reverts back to old ways. It drives me crazy and makes me sad that I could be so weak. Again. I can get tattoos. I did roller derby. I can break bones without shedding a single tear. But ask me to say no to those cookies and you might as well kill me now.
This is hard! I knew it was going to be tough...but man! Between the plague and now my sciatic nerve going completely haywire, I'm forced to rely completely on my diet...which is obviously incredibly difficult. Massive sigh.
I don't know how, but I have to get through this.
I feel bad about myself
Nom nom on the cookies
Now I'm totally looking fat and old
Nom nom on the burger and fries
I shouldn't be eating this
Frown, cry, and nom nom on something bad some more.
Rinse and Repeat.
I feel like crap...and depressed...and then I eat...and feel like crap because of what I'm doing. And you'd think the obvious solution would be to only feed my emotions with healthy foods, but my brain takes on a life of it's own. It's like invasion of the body snatchers and before I know it, half a container of those delicious sugar cookies with the heaping mound of frosting is already gone.
And to top it all off, I wore the least flattering, slinky, clingy top I probably own to work today. I look like crap. I'm hanging out all over the place and you can see the jiggle when I walk. This will get washed and then promptly thrown into the closet of "clothes I'll fit into because I did when I met my husband". In there would be my goal size 10 skinny jeans from Old Navy that I haven't worn in a really really long time.
The Super Bowl was this weekend and we had friends in town. I might as well have been turned into an actual pig with what I put into my mouth. It was outrageous. But I didn't stop it. I thought about it a few times...unfortunately, however, that thing about it being the thought that counts, doesn't work when you stuff your face with mini corndogs and beer and super bowl party munchies for an entire weekend.
I haven't weighed myself and I'm debating on whether or not to put it off for another week.
I feel like such a failure. I always get to the 10 lb loss mark and something in me just reverts back to old ways. It drives me crazy and makes me sad that I could be so weak. Again. I can get tattoos. I did roller derby. I can break bones without shedding a single tear. But ask me to say no to those cookies and you might as well kill me now.
This is hard! I knew it was going to be tough...but man! Between the plague and now my sciatic nerve going completely haywire, I'm forced to rely completely on my diet...which is obviously incredibly difficult. Massive sigh.
I don't know how, but I have to get through this.
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Don't Judge a Recipe By Its Name
I'm in a food rut. I'm in a lot of ruts, actually....but we'll concentrate on food right now. I'm plagued with chronic boredom I think. If I do too much of something, it kind of grates on me and I just don't want to have anything to do with it for a while. Whether is be my gloriously amazing craft room, reading, healthy foods, or exercise.
Our dinners are sooooooo boring! Protein and veggie, protein and veggie, protein and just shoot me please. And this is seriously all it is. Chicken or fish, occasionally some red meat and then some sort of frozen veggie on the side that is hardly doctored up.
Lunches are no better.
I. Need. Variety. This second.
In trying to find some recipes, I'm realizing that I'm seriously judgmental when it comes to food. Specifically the names of these recipes. Some of the names just sound so funny! How can I take an entree called "Tuna Noodle Doodles" seriously. Come on now! And then there are the cases where I come across a dandy sounding recipe, skim through the ingredients and see Greek yogurt, plain yogurt, cottage cheese or any other such random healthy foods I can't stand on their own, and I immediately write this possible deliciousness off.
Oh man.
Hi my name is Sarah and I have a judgmental food prejudice.
I'm off to find some recipes....I HAVE to experiment with some of these.
Our dinners are sooooooo boring! Protein and veggie, protein and veggie, protein and just shoot me please. And this is seriously all it is. Chicken or fish, occasionally some red meat and then some sort of frozen veggie on the side that is hardly doctored up.
Lunches are no better.
I. Need. Variety. This second.
In trying to find some recipes, I'm realizing that I'm seriously judgmental when it comes to food. Specifically the names of these recipes. Some of the names just sound so funny! How can I take an entree called "Tuna Noodle Doodles" seriously. Come on now! And then there are the cases where I come across a dandy sounding recipe, skim through the ingredients and see Greek yogurt, plain yogurt, cottage cheese or any other such random healthy foods I can't stand on their own, and I immediately write this possible deliciousness off.
Oh man.
Hi my name is Sarah and I have a judgmental food prejudice.
I'm off to find some recipes....I HAVE to experiment with some of these.
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Day 28: 211.5 lbs - Plagues, Formulas, and Workouts...Oh My!
So I've seriously been stuck on writing this thing for like a week and a half. Everyday I open up my draft and have to change the day....
This stupidplague flu that is going around.... Holy smokes, man. I started coughing last Sunday and then it just killed me. I was out of work for 3.5 days, stuck to the couch, surviving on soups and heaping servings of teen angst via Netflix.I haven't been to the gym in over a week, but I've managed to lose some weight still (yay!!). I started biking home from Batman's workplace again this week; and while I'm huffing like a smoker and totally dead by the time I get home, it's a step in the right direction.
I'm officially down 7.5 pounds now. I'm kind of behind where I need to be to stay on track, but I still think I've made a ton of progress. I need to lose 22 more pounds by my birthday, which is just a little over 9 weeks away....2.4 pounds a week. I need to magically find a caloric deficit of 8400 for that happen.According to the Harris Benedict Equation, to maintain my current grossness, I'll need 2440 calories a day. So between diet and exercise, I have to find a deficit of 1200 calories. I think it's totally doable. I'm thinking, consuming about 1400 calories. I burn about 200 or so on my 5 mile ride home, and I do more cardio at the gym to kill time until Batman is done so there is the rest of the deficit. I can totally do this!
I had issues last week trying to find a workout routine to follow. I was torn between the type of body I ultimately want. I know genetics plays a part, and quite frankly, I'm a little nervous about what the "fit" me will look like, since I've never actually seen her. I want so many different things for me. I want to be lean and fit and strong, but I also want that beautiful long dancer's body. I had so much anxiety over this decision when really I had already made it. I posted this on Facebook a few weeks ago:
"Hear this! Before 2013 is over this will happen:
Weigh 150 lbs
Do 3 unassisted pull ups
Do 1 full set of hanging leg lifts
Be able to punch somebody
Have confidence to stand up for myself"
So I'm just going to go for it and do what I need to do and not dwell on it. I have these goals and I need to get going. I decided to follow the Muscle and Fitness Trainer, which gave me a pretty hefty strength workout, but one that is completely doable and changes weekly. No muscle memory issues for me!
I'm going to do this.I'm going to break up with my fat!
This stupid
I'm officially down 7.5 pounds now. I'm kind of behind where I need to be to stay on track, but I still think I've made a ton of progress. I need to lose 22 more pounds by my birthday, which is just a little over 9 weeks away....2.4 pounds a week. I need to magically find a caloric deficit of 8400 for that happen.According to the Harris Benedict Equation, to maintain my current grossness, I'll need 2440 calories a day. So between diet and exercise, I have to find a deficit of 1200 calories. I think it's totally doable. I'm thinking, consuming about 1400 calories. I burn about 200 or so on my 5 mile ride home, and I do more cardio at the gym to kill time until Batman is done so there is the rest of the deficit. I can totally do this!
I had issues last week trying to find a workout routine to follow. I was torn between the type of body I ultimately want. I know genetics plays a part, and quite frankly, I'm a little nervous about what the "fit" me will look like, since I've never actually seen her. I want so many different things for me. I want to be lean and fit and strong, but I also want that beautiful long dancer's body. I had so much anxiety over this decision when really I had already made it. I posted this on Facebook a few weeks ago:
"Hear this! Before 2013 is over this will happen:
Weigh 150 lbs
Do 3 unassisted pull ups
Do 1 full set of hanging leg lifts
Be able to punch somebody
Have confidence to stand up for myself"
So I'm just going to go for it and do what I need to do and not dwell on it. I have these goals and I need to get going. I decided to follow the Muscle and Fitness Trainer, which gave me a pretty hefty strength workout, but one that is completely doable and changes weekly. No muscle memory issues for me!
I'm going to do this.I'm going to break up with my fat!
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Day 15: 214.2 lbs - Shake It Out
4.8 pounds lost forever! 25.2 pounds to go by my birthday!
I can totally do this. I just need to stay on track and pay attention to my diet....cause that is where I suck. I'll think of yummy, fatty, super carb heavy foods that sound really good and then I'll go have them...just to have them. Not because I was hungry, not because I needed their empty nutrition, but because I just got to thinking about them. And then I got to craving them so much that I could taste them....and then I just had to eat it. This happened yesterday with one of those frosted Honey Bun sugar loaded contraptions you can get at the gas station. I caved and got it....but I didn't gain anything, so I guess there is a small upside.
I can't kill myself every time I slip up. I just need to stay in control. A slip up here or there, seriously spaced out, is not going to kill me. A slip up here or there, every other day or so, will. I will be doing everything possible to keep my cravings in check, while still understanding that I am a female and sometimes, I just need to act on them or force as huge binge in like a week.
Florence + The Machine's song Shake It Out is my anthem for 2013. I'm changing! At nearly 28, I'm finally starting to figure out who I am. A seamstress, crafter, costumer, wife. This year I'll be refining. New adjectives will describe me! Confident, sexy, fit. This is the year that I will be everything I want to be.
I have every hope I can keep this momentum up. My goals are attainable. I WILL do this.
I can totally do this. I just need to stay on track and pay attention to my diet....cause that is where I suck. I'll think of yummy, fatty, super carb heavy foods that sound really good and then I'll go have them...just to have them. Not because I was hungry, not because I needed their empty nutrition, but because I just got to thinking about them. And then I got to craving them so much that I could taste them....and then I just had to eat it. This happened yesterday with one of those frosted Honey Bun sugar loaded contraptions you can get at the gas station. I caved and got it....but I didn't gain anything, so I guess there is a small upside.
I can't kill myself every time I slip up. I just need to stay in control. A slip up here or there, seriously spaced out, is not going to kill me. A slip up here or there, every other day or so, will. I will be doing everything possible to keep my cravings in check, while still understanding that I am a female and sometimes, I just need to act on them or force as huge binge in like a week.
Florence + The Machine's song Shake It Out is my anthem for 2013. I'm changing! At nearly 28, I'm finally starting to figure out who I am. A seamstress, crafter, costumer, wife. This year I'll be refining. New adjectives will describe me! Confident, sexy, fit. This is the year that I will be everything I want to be.
I have every hope I can keep this momentum up. My goals are attainable. I WILL do this.
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